As I mentioned before, me and the boyfriend had the opportunity to play an acoustic set at this little charity event which was organised by Charlotte (from Sherbet and Sparkles) and Ben (who is a very talented musician, check him out here). When I saw the announcement on Facebook and the call for other musicians/artists to join in, I knew we had to go for it. You know sometimes there are these opportunities that are a little scary (and performing in front of an audience still is a very big deal for me), but you know exactly that if you won’t do it you’ll ask yourself ‘what if’ until the end of time. So I did what we had to do and it worked out.
The day of the event I wasn’t feeling very well. I was having a little cold and I really just wanted to lie down on the couch. But as the starting time came closer and closer, adrenaline kicked in and I couldn’t feel my body aching anymore. So the boyfriend and I grabbed the guitar and off we went. The gig was held in this awesome flat in the main station area. It was huge and I was actually surprised that you can find such a decent place to live in an area that still is a rather dodgy part of town. While we were starting to set up our stuff, people slowly arrived and before I knew it the flat was quite crowded with people. I was very happy that two of my friends could make it to support us which was very much appreciated since I was freaking nervous. We were the first to play which scared the fuck out of me. I mean I can imagine it’s kind of a hard job to warm up the crowd and get it in the mood. But in this case we really didn’t have to worry. After a few words of introduction by the organisers, it was our turn. I hadn’t thought that much about what to say, how to introduce us and our songs because I like it to come naturally. But since I was so horribly nervous I didn’t talk that much at all. It’s kind of strange, I feel kind of safe when singing because I know what to do and when, but talking in front of an audience makes me feel pretty uneasy. I really hope this will turn into something like routine the more I’m doing it. The same goes for the whole performance. I was nervous almost the entire time, for various reasons. First of all, there were quite a lot of people there. Something around 50 which is the biggest crowd I’ve ever performed for. Since this was taking place in a private flat, it all felt kind of personal which was good. But it also made me feel more nervous because there wasn’t any real distance to the audience. No stage, no background talking. Just us on chairs and a crowd sitting on the floor only focused on our performance.
On the other hand, this intimacy made the gig even more special. I was looking closely at people and their reactions and I saw quite a few emotions and reassurance. Which made me so happy and blessed to be able to do this. You know, when you sit down and write songs and rehearse them over and over again by yourself, you start to dream a lot about what it’s going to be like to share them with people. And when you’re finally able to, it’s the most amazing thing in the world. I mean every song started with a line, a note in my head. And now it’s taken on a life of its own with the ability to evoke something in other people. Like some sort of chain reaction. Pure magic! And the fact that this gig was for charity made it even more special. In the end, over 300 Euro were raised for a charity that helps disabled children. And there were a lot of talented people involved who made this happen. In retrospective, I’m actually quite happy we were first up because the others set the bar pretty high. There was Simit with his guitar playing his so-called moanings (he doesn’t have titles for his songs). Hugo who was reading a self-written poem full of emotions (and probably the only person that was more nervous than me). A raffle with awesome prizes (I definitely would’ve loved the Pooh mug or the Japanese manga). And in the end, an amazing performance by Ben and his crew. While his music (I’d probably describe it as Soul-Pop) isn’t exactly my cup of tea, I could really imagine him going big one day. His voice is amazing and he’s definitely an entertainer. So all in all, it was an amazing night! I really love the concept of this charity gig thing and if there’s ever gonna be another event like this I’d love to be a part of it again. I also really enjoyed the company of other musicians and artsy people. It definitely was a step in the right direction.