Yay, the Easter weekend is finally here! I have been looking forward to having 4 days off so much after the busy weeks before. Last weekend I basically had only half a day off on Sunday because I came back from London around noon. I was absolutely knackered when I finally arrived back in Frankfurt. On Monday, I felt like having a jetlag, just from having to get up around 6 in the morning and working until late at night while I was in London. It was crazy! And this week wasn’t any less busy. I don’t really know how I made it through, I literally had to drag myself to work yesterday. But I made it and while we’re busy in a different way this weekend (with the apartment and family things), there’ll also be time to relax. I definitely deserve it!
To start off the long weekend, we had one of our surprise dates yesterday. Being the bad girlfriend I am I guessed what the boyfriend had planned before he had a chance to surprise me. To be fair, I only did because I’d planned the exact same thing for the next week. But it wasn’t any less fun! We went to Dippemess, a fair which is held every spring in Frankfurt. We’d already been there last year and liked it so much we wanted to come back. To be honest, I don’t really know why I like it that much. There isn’t any difference to other fairs in Germany, really. There’s a ferris wheel, a rollercoaster, a ghost train, a water ride and many more rides. Of course, there’s a wide choice of food and drinks as well.
After walking through the whole place, we decided we didn’t really feel like going on any rides. I was too tired for a thrill. Instead, we got some fries, Currywurst and a beer and sat down watching the people passing by. And then we discovered something: UFO catchers (you know those claw machines you can win stuffed animals and other toys with). Playing UFO catcher was a real hobby for me when I lived in Japan. It could’ve easily turned into an addiction. Maybe it already was. I have no idea how much money I spent and how many stupid toys I won. It wasn’t about the prizes, it was about winning, about perfecting that skill to get the thing you want into that damn hole. Unfortunately, German UFO catchers are a real pain in the ass. Their claws work a lot different from Japanese ones, so I never really bothered to play. But yesterday we did. I’d spotted a little minion which looked like it was possible to capture. And I was right. It took us 3 tries to get it. Yay! To celebrate our win, we bought some cocktails and sat down in a deck chair. Aaaaah, almost like holidays! It started to get pretty cold, so we went for one last look around and then headed home. I think I haven’t slept this well in a long time.
Happy Easter everyone!
“Whoa” is exactly what my life is like right now. I hate that I have to apologize again for neglecting this place, for not having been around when I wanted to. Believe me, I’ve been here in my thoughts many times, collecting ideas for posts. I just absolutely didn’t have the time for it. You’ll see when you’ve read the “whoas” that are currently keeping me busy ;).
- Whoa, I’ve turned into a machine! Involuntarily. At least that’s what I’m feeling like. A machine that’s working and working and working and almost never gets to rest. Work’s been really tough lately. Probably one of the toughest times I’ve ever experienced. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t have a problem with working hard and/or a lot. What I do have a problem with, though, is having to get up for work early for 3 weeks straight without being able to sleep in just once. Today has actually been the first day in 3 weeks that I got to do that. It felt like heaven. And it was more than necessary. I’m not sure if I could’ve gone on like that much longer. I was so exhausted, I felt like a zombie – and I’m sure I looked like one, too. Horrible! And the worst thing is that I still felt like I wasn’t resilient enough. Stupid, right? I have no idea yet when and if the situation will change, but I will fight for my right, that’s for sure.
- Whoa, we have found a drummer! Yay, the band is coming along really well. It’s amazing what becomes of a song when you add drums to it. When I listen to the things we’ve created it still seems like a miracle to me. I never thought I would be where I am now a couple of months ago when I had this idea of founding a band. And I’m sure that’s what the majority of people I told about it was thinking. Now all we need is a bass player and we’re complete. There’s actually talk going on about hitting the stage sometime next year. I have to hyperventilate at the mere thought of that and there’s still a lot of hard work to do until we reach that point where we’re actually ready to step in front of other people and share our creations with them. But I’m convinced that in the end we’ll get there and it’s going to be the beginning of an amazing adventure.
- Whoa, I’m turning 30! Oh yes, next Friday this girl here will have to say goodbye to her 20s. And you know what, I’m actually looking forward to it. The last 10 years have been an exciting ride and I’m sure the next will be even more so. I have a nice little party planned and can’t wait to celebrate with all those great people in my life. I’ll even have a friend from London coming over who I haven’t seen in 4 years. Good times!
- Whoa, there’s more! I’m finally going to buy an electric guitar which I’m sure will entertain not just me, but the whole neighbourhood ;). I’ll see Billy Talent live on Sunday. If you haven’t listened to their new album “Dead Silence” yet, go and get it. It’s a powerful piece of music. I’ll have a meet up with people from a 30 Seconds to Mars forum where I’m probably spending too much time. I’m really looking forward to meeting some amazing people and having a good time. There is also a little mission involved as a certain lead singer is supposed to be in town that day.
So yeah, my life is pretty crazy right now. And as much as I like craziness, I could do with a little less just for a little while.
Do you know that feeling when everything just seems to be a little too much? When you just want to dig a hole and disappear from the world to never come back? I have to admit that there have been quite a few situations over the past few weeks when I wanted to do exactly that. First of all, there’s my new job that’s been quite challenging lately. And that’s exactly what I wanted when I took it. But when you’re new to a company that works totally different from what you’re used to, when you’re thrown into client work with noone really telling you what you’re supposed to do, there can be moments when you just want to throw your papers on the ground and lock yourself in the toilet to cry for a little while. At least, that’s how I felt. I actually did sit on the toilet with tears in my eyes once. Not because I was sad or desperate. Because I was furious about the situation. I hate being clueless more than anything in the world. It slows me down in my work and makes me vulnerable to mistakes. But I didn’t give up. I worked my way through it, I pretended to know everything when I actually didn’t at all – and now, after a few weeks, I see a lot clearer. It’s not perfect yet, but I’m sure I’ll get there. And what’s most important: I will grow through this experience. If someone throws you into the water, you have to swim. Move forward and don’t look back. That’s what I’m doing, even if the water is so cold that it hurts. There’s no way I’m drowning!
Then there’s my move that’s taken up a lot of my free time lately. I’ve been meeting my realtor, my new landlord, my old landlord, organising movers, packing boxes, throwing half my stuff out – and there’s still so much to do until I’ll finally move on the weekend. Even though my back already hurts like hell from rummaging around all evening, I know what I’m doing it for. I can’t wait until my new life finally begins. There’s going to be a lot more free time – which leads me to the next busy part of my life. It’s really funny how nothing seems to work right when I’m having a lot of time on my hands. And when I’m busy as hell, there’s suddenly a progress. One of my private projects (some people might actually call them dreams) has really taken a step forward lately. I’ve been waiting for this for quite a while, so I was overly excited when the progress came. Then I realized that there couldn’t have been a worse time. But the time is never right and when dreams knock on your door, you don’t just tell them to come back another time. Because they won’t. So I jumped right in. I was supposed to have a meeting this week which was postponed to next week – lucky me! I know I would’ve rocked it anyway. But for such an important event I definitely prefer a week that doesn’t involve 2 business trips and a move on the side. I will definitely let you know how it went. When the time is right. Until then, I will leave you with some lyrics I wrote during that busy mess my life was over the past weeks. It’s what I learned from it all. Because everything happens for a reason. So think about it (and feel free to share your thoughts in the comments)!
Chase me and I’ll attack
Beat me and I’ll rise above
Destroy me and I’ll resurrect